Ombuds Report: Celebrate the Wins

We’re all quick to remember our mistakes, losses, and miscommunications.  I want to remind us to stop and celebrate our wins.  I’m covering this topic for two reasons.  First, I recently did a training about resilience, and at the end I asked participants what they were taking away from the training.  Multiple people mentioned this concept of celebrating wins and how they needed the reminder to reflect not only on their shortcomings but also on their daily wins.  Second, I rewatched the Disney movie Soul with my son.  Soul came out during the pandemic, and when I first saw it, I was less impressed by it than I was by its creative and plot-heavy cousin Onward, also released during the pandemic.  This second time, though, I think I better understood its point:  While life can be full of huge ups and downs, dreams dashed and dreams realized, in between life is full of small, beautiful moments that we might miss if we are not careful. 

To me, these are related.  I would hope that anyone celebrates big accomplishments like a promotion, a raise, a graduation, and acceptance into a new program.  But what about these?  You finish a difficult conversation with your supervisor, and you share with them everything you intended to.  Or you set boundaries with a friend and then stick to those boundaries, even when they push back.  Or you hear the same passive-aggressive comment from a colleague, and this time you keep your cool.  These are all wins that might get unnoticed, especially if you are instead focusing on what you forgot to say in those conversations or what you wish you hadn’t said.  Celebrating wins does not mean you deny your mistakes.  It means that while you acknowledge the times you messed up, you acknowledge the times when you got it right. 

I will admit, celebrating everyday wins does not come naturally to me.  I was really struggling with a colleague recently; every interaction we had filled me with self-doubt and stayed in my mind as I tried to fall asleep at night.  Then we had an unpleasant interaction, and for that day, I was able to let it go.  When I told my husband about the interaction and how I didn’t really care, he congratulated me and (sort of) forced me to stop and reflect on what a big deal that was.  I can’t control what this colleague thinks of me or how they respond to me, but I can control how much I let it consume my time and energy. 

Here are a few ideas for celebrating everyday wins:

• Journal at the end of each day or each week to document the wins
• Make a plan with a friend or colleague to check in on each other’s wins
• Create a celebration jar where you document wins as they happen
• Commemorate wins on a calendar, so you can go back and look at your progress
• Treat yourself regularly

We are quick to hold on to our loses.  Let’s start to hold on to the wins.